bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Randomize
