Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Randomize
