okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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