I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
Randomize
