Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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