I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
