I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
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