dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Randomize
