Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
Randomize
