you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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