we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
