Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
