from now on my penis is your penis
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
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