I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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