see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
