took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
