Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
You need to stop texting me at SEVEN in the morning. It wakes my one night stands up and makes for the awkward talk way too early.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
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