Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
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