Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
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