I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
