U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
Randomize
