We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
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