well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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