My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
Randomize
