So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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