Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
