it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
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