one word: firstdatebathroomanal
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
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