Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
Randomize
