There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
Randomize