butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Randomize
