I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Randomize
