dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
