Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize