i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Randomize
