physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Randomize
