I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Randomize
