So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
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