p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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