I would go down on you faster than GM stock
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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