Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
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