Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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