"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
Randomize
