This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
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