Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
