I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
