You work out of a Hotel?
Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Slut skills are useful in every country.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
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