This girl is more easily done than said...
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
Randomize
