explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
