I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Randomize
